Key to the Heavens
by Settiai
Summary: Five years after leaving Sunnydale, Dawn find out that being alive doesn't mean that you're living. :: Dawn/Spike


Title: Key To The Heavens

Author: Settiai

Disclaimer: "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and other related characters are all properties of Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, and other related corporations. No infringement is intended. This story, such as it is, was written as a sign of respect and love for the characters, the show, and their creator. I claim no ownership of the aforementioned show and characters.

Rating: R

Explanation: This is my story for the Stoner/Junkie Ficathon on LiveJournal, and it was written for essene.

Summary: Five years after leaving Sunnydale, Dawn find out that being alive doesn't mean that you're living.

Feedback: Comments and helpful criticisms are always appreciated.

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At times, Dawn couldn't believe that it had been five years.

Five years since Buffy had decided to play God, choosing to end her own life rather than let her younger sister make her own decision.

Five years since Giles had left Sunnydale, turning his back on the people who had grown to consider him family.

Five years since the biker gang from Hell had rode into town, burning and killing everything that had made the mistake of being in their path.

Five years since what had once been the Scoobies had packed up their belongings and left town, along with most of the other residents of Sunnydale.

Five years since Xander and Anya had headed toward Las Vegas with wedding bells ringing in their ears.

Five years since Willow and Tara had started toward Los Angeles in order to let Angel know what had happened.

Five years since she and Spike had stolen a car and drove to New York in order to convince Hank Summers that it would be in his best interest to give his youngest daughter enough money to keep her well-off until she was legal.

Five years since the man who had never really been her father had given them enough money to not only keep her comfortable, but also enough to put her through college if she so wished.

And five years since he had signed the papers saying that he granted full guardianship of his fifteen-year-old daughter to William Halls, who seemed to be a perfect gentleman with a solid past thanks to the false paperwork Spike had bought for fifty dollars.

It really didn't seem like it had been that long, at least not to Dawn. It seemed like just yesterday that she and Spike had decided that the others deserved to have normal lives… or at least as normal a life as two witches, a former vengeance demon, and a man who had been fighting demons since he was a sixteen-year-old could live.

But it wasn't.

An amused giggle escaped Dawn's lips as she breathed in the smoke-filled air and leaned back against the pillows that someone had laid out behind them. She glanced around after a moment, her eyes moving over her group of "friends" for the night.

Most of them were about her age, and the older ones didn't matter. In fact, they probably brought needed experience to the gathering. But the younger ones…

Dawn rolled her eyes as one of the girls her age, Rachel or something like that, took a deep breath from a pipe before handing it to a boy who couldn't be more than sixteen.

"Come on, you should try this," Rachel said with an amused smirk.

"What is it?" the kid asked nervously, and it became immediately obvious to everyone there that he was new to their world.

"It doesn't matter," Dawn explained with a grin as she reached over and gratefully took the pipe from Rachel's hand. "You just take it and enjoy the ride."

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The door to the room they were in slammed open, but only a few people bothered to glance over at it. As long as no one yelled out "Cops!" they knew that there was nothing to worry about.

Or at least they thought they did.

Dawn rolled her eyes as she caught sight of who was standing in the door, and she merely turned her attention back toward the man sitting beside her… or, more precisely, where his hand--which was already under her shirt--was slowing working towards. She could practically feel the glare that Spike was shooting in her direction, but she couldn't force herself to care.

"Go away, Spike," she called out before leaning in closer to the guy beside her and pressing her lips against his hungrily. What was his name again? "J" something… John? Jim? James? Jack?

"Like hell," the vampire replied, a disapproving expression on his face as he glanced around the smoke-filled room. "Want to tell me what you think you're doing?"

"J" something gave her a bleary-eyed look as he pulled away from her ever so slightly. "Who is that guy?" he asked with a shrug in the direction of the door.

"A pain in the ass," Dawn answered with a groan as Spike suddenly started walking in her direction. "He thinks that he's my father, but he keeps forgetting that I'm not a little kid anymore."

Before she could say anything else, Spike quickly leaned down and swooped her up into his arms. "What the hell are doing?" she asked angrily. "Put me down right now, you bastard!"

"Sorry pet," he said in a tone that was anything but apologetic. "We're going back to the apartment."

Dawn could feel everyone's eyes on her, and she suddenly felt rage spring up from somewhere deep inside of her. She struggled against his grip even more, trying her best to force him into dropping her.

"Dammit Spike, put me down," she said bitterly. "If you haven't noticed, I'm not a little girl anymore. I'm an adult, so you can't control my life."

"Wanna bet?" Spike replied, and the gleam in his eyes sent a shiver down Dawn's spine.

"Yeah, I wanna bet," Dawn spat out as she struggled even more. "You're not my father, or my brother, or my boyfriend, or anything. The only reason you're here is because you fell in love with my sister, and when she died you felt like you had to keep that fucking promise you made her. What you don't seem to get is that the end of the world has come and gone, and I don't need you anymore!"

She kept wrestling against his hold, and he finally put her back onto the ground. As her feet connected with the floor, she wobbled unsteadily for a few seconds. Still, she managed to force herself to stay upright.

Dawn wanted to tell Spike to go away, that she didn't need him anymore… but something stopped her. She blinked a few times as the world around her shimmered slightly, and she grinned as the greenish light that she had been seeing for the last two hours suddenly bathed everything in the room.

A few giggles escaped her lips as she slowly spun around, her anger already forgotten. "Everything's so pretty," she said softly.

"Are we looking at the same place?" Spike asked, a worried expression making its way onto his face. "Because pretty isn't exactly the word I'd use."

Dawn merely grinned and twirled a little faster. As she slowly came to a stop, however, she felt a momentary feeling of confusion wash over her. She blinked a few times as the world around her began to spiral wildly. "Wow," she whispered softly.

She felt Spike's hand grab her arm, and from what seemed to be a great distance she heard him wildly ask her friends she was on.

"Just pot," someone answered, and then she felt her body slowly sink toward the ground. One of the spinning, twirling shapes suddenly stepped forward, and then it reached down and grabbed one of the other shapes… and she realized that it was Spike.

And he was mad.

"The hell it is," he growled threateningly, or at least she assumed it was threateningly. Because Spike was like that, even though she didn't know why. Why would someone have to be threatening when the world was so pretty? So shiny?

And then she understood.

She wasn't Dawn anymore. She was no longer trapped in that pitiful excuse for a shell.

She was the Key. The Key to the world, and to the heavens… and to everything. She was Everything.

And then she was Nothing.

----------

The moment that Dawn opened her eyes, she felt a wave of nausea shoot through her body. Moaning slightly, she turned onto her side and silently prayed that she could just die.

After a few moments, the slightest twinge of confusion made its way into her muddled mind. She vaguely remembered being in room with a bunch of college-aged kids she had hooked up with at some bar. They had passed around the basics… mostly pot, with some harder stuff mixed in here and there.

But what had happened after that?

Dawn closed her eyes again as she dove into her memories, trying her best to figure out what had happened after that. Spike's face popped into her mind, and for just an instant she could hear his voice echoing in her mind… and then she remembered.

"Shit," she said quietly as her memories came rushing back with a vengeance.

A soft chuckle that sounded like a mixture of annoyance and relief suddenly reached her ears, and a familiar voice quickly followed it. "You don't know the half of it."

Dawn reluctantly opened her eyes, and she was surprised to find Spike staring at her with a haunted expression on his face. "You look like you've seen a ghost," she whispered hoarsely. "What's with the face?"

"I thought I was going to lose you," Spike answered softly as he walked over and knelt beside her bed.

"What?" she asked with surprise before she realized that they weren't in the shabby apartment they had been calling home for the last two months. Her eyes traveled to her arm, where an IV was sticking out of her vein. "Hospital?" she asked after a moment.

Spike nodded as he reached out and gently ran his hand through her long hair. "They still don't know exactly what it was you took," he said softly. "It definitely had some pot in it, but there were some stronger hallucinogens as well."

"Not exactly my smartest move, was it?" Dawn asked, the barest hint of a smile making its way onto her face.

Spike smiled slightly before hesitantly looking away from her. "I called Angel," he said quietly. "He told me a number where I could reach the others."

Dawn glanced at him in shock. "What? Are you insane? Why the hell would you do something like that?"

"Because we both know that you need someone else in your life other than me," he said a few seconds of silence. "I've done my best to keep the promise I made to your big sis… and just look at the mess I've made of it."

Dawn stared at him for a few seconds.

"I wouldn't say that," she answered softly, a hurt expression on her face.

"Maybe not," he replied sharply, "but I would. You'll be twenty in a few more weeks. You should be in college, hanging out with all your girlfriends, studying about… I don't know, whatever it is that college students nowadays study." 

Dawn carefully moved her arms to the sides of the hospital bed and pushed herself up into a sitting position. She bit back a curse as the nausea that had been fading came back with a vengeance, but she managed to stay silent as she met his gaze.

"Have you already called them?" she asked quietly.

"Two days ago," Spike answered with a nod. He smiled a bit at the sudden expression of confusion that appeared on her face. "It's been almost five days. Like I said, I thought that I was going to lose you."

"Oh," Dawn managed to say weakly. She bit her lip and looked down at her hands for a second. "What did they say?"

"The witches will be here tomorrow," he answered. "The others would be coming, but apparently being pregnant makes it difficult to fly."

"Anya's pregnant?" Dawn asked with an incredulous smile.

"No, Xander is," Spike replied innocently. Dawn merely raised an eyebrow, however, and he let his mouth twist into a smirk. "Eight months, and they apparently already have a two-year-old."

Dawn shook her head as she let her body sink back down into a laying position. "Xander and Anya with kids," she said with a smile. "Who'd have thought?"

She finally met his gaze once more. "Where have they been living?" she asked hesitantly.

"Los Angeles," he replied after a few seconds. "Near Angel and company. They've been there for almost four years."

Dawn bit her lip, and for just a minute she looked like the scared little girl who had disappeared years earlier. "And that's where you want me to go?" she asked softly.

Spike nodded as he reached out and grabbed her hand. "It's for your own good, 'Lil Bit."

"I'm not that little anymore," she shot back.

"No," he said after a few moments of silence. "No, you're not."

"You're leaving, aren't you?" she asked softly, a few tears welling up in her eyes. "You're going to abandon me, just like my dad did. And Mom. And Giles. And Buffy."

Spike started to reply, but he paused for just a second and really looked at her face. Then he smiled slightly before leaning in and placing a gentle kiss on her lips.

"No," he whispered quietly as he pulled away, his hand dropping hers as he did so. "I'm not abandoning you."

Dawn slowly reached her hand up and touched her lip, a startled look appearing on her face. A few tears trickled down her face as Spike stood up and straightened his duster.

"But you're still leaving," she whispered. "Because, no matter how much you try, you're still in love with Buffy."

Spike gave her a sad smile before turning and walking toward the door. He paused in the doorway, however, and turned back toward her.

"I'll go and tell the doctor that you're awake," he said after a moment. "And then I'll head back to the apartment and pack **our** things."

He winked as he walked out of the room, and Dawn couldn't help but let a radiant smile makes its way onto her face.


End file.
